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I received a surprise email from Mimi (KL), who just so happened to encounter my blog and asked me a very tricky question: Why is love so complicated? Well, first of all, I am not sure what prompted Mimi to ask me that question as I’m not a love guru to begin with. Perhaps, my blog title “Complicated Simplicity” (used to be named that way and please don’t ask me why) echoes some underlying words of wisdom hidden within my blog.  Since I don’t want to disappoint her, I thought of sharing my views on that question.

Personally, I came across many people during my life. For some, love was so easy and for many, love was indeed difficult. This is from what I observed and what they told me. As I went around asking people with different points of view concerning love, I realised that a lot of people tend to mix up love and other things like dating and sex.  Some say love is complicated when the other side don’t bother to call them or care for them when they are lonely. Some says love is complicated when the other side refuses to make love with them. Some says love is complicated when the other side couldn’t offer much material security (especially money). When too many things get mixed up, love becomes complicated to most people.

Love is a feeling and by definition it is perhaps beyond understanding but it’s not that complicated. We make it complicated because we want tangible proof for love. But when it comes to love, we need to remember that there will never be a tangible proof for it. We go through life expecting love to be a certain way and then when it’s not we feel pain but what we don’t realize is that we expected the pain (not the joy) and, therefore, we attracted it.  When you choose someone, you have to be willing to love them for who they are, where they are, and not get sucked up into wanting them to change, to become so much more than who they are so you can be happy. If you don’t like the person standing before you and his/her habits annoy you and you don’t know if you can spend the rest of your life with this person, say  no and move on.

Alright, I guess my views are now making your thoughts even more complicated. Haha. The bottom line is, Love yourself first before rushing into relationship! Be the love you want in your life and then you’ll naturally attract it.